i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
