he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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