Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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