I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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