Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
