oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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