did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
there is puke in my bra ... again
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