I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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