i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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