dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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