You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize