you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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