let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize