i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
