I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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