I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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