Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Randomize
