Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
