i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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