Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize