Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
