so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
