Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
My bed smells like the plague
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
