i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Randomize
