Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
No subtext here. People are naked.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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