Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's official drugs can't kill me
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
