North Korea, Best Korea!
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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