I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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