stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize