Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
