K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
