I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
