I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
