Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
