Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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