id be glad to
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
