I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
