You just made me feel so damn special
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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