yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
