Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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