Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
