We're like a lot better than the average bears
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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