you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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