Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
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