you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
