you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
