i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
