she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Randomize
