please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
