I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
