My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
where are you?
Hypothermia
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize