I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
